You want to be physically fit, right? Imagine your ideal self full of energy and swagger. Gorgeous. Now, there’s something standing in between you and gorgeous which needs to be stared down. Competing priorities. Or what I call goal rivalry.
In How to have personal, relationship, and work goals that play nicely together, I compare goals to children who compete for their parent’s attention. Sibling rivalry meets goal rivalry. I know the tug of children at my knees and the tug of goals unmet which can lead to crushing exhaustion.
I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. ~ Fannie Lou Hamer, voting rights activist, civil rights leader, and philanthropist
Being physically weak and depleted can be the result of illness or injury, heroic sacrifice for others, or self-inflicted neglect and wounding. My life has included all three.
Understandably, when my family was young, four children needed my nearly undivided attention. At some point we matured which theoretically freed me up for more “me time.” Yet, being in the habit of reaching relationship goals before personal goals, it would take time for me to identify and establish fitness goals and habits.
I’m getting sick and tired of doing anything half-way. ~ Knute Rockne, football player and coach
Counting steps, stretching here and there, and randomly “exercising” added up to more pounds on my body and inches on my waist. Half-way exercise may have worked for me in the past but not today. Running, pushing weights, and sweating in public aren’t my natural inclinations, never mind passions. I was a verbal anti-runner quipping, “Why would anyone ever run? We have cars now.” Yet, two years ago I was so sick and tired that I decided to run. I prioritized exercise in the form of running. All in.
The world will change for the better when people decide they are sick and tired of being sick and tired of the way the world is, and decide to change themselves. ~ Sydney Madwed, poet and speaker
I’m changing myself and the world by prioritizing my fitness through running. While running isn’t for everyone or for every day, it is for anyone who wants to give it a try according to their abilities and needs. Walking, biking, swimming, rebounding, and other aerobic exercises build cardio fitness, too. Choose, commit, and move.
By consciously prioritizing running two years ago, I helped myself to avoid subconsciously choosing to always meet my relationship goals first. The people and work I loved needed to wait, and they did. Gorgeous.
What is your highest personal, relationship, and work goal? Of these three, which are you most likely to prioritize out of habit or inclination? Are you satisfied with your priorities? With your fitness? Do you have health and fitness goals?
All the best ~~~~~~~~ Angie Mc
Making fitness a priority is important to me, too. In fact, it’s so much a part of my life and I’ve been doing it for so long, that it’s as natural to me as getting dressed or making dinner. Sometimes I don’t feel like doing any of the three, but I do them anyway, because once we’ve made fitness a habit, it falls into place with the rest of them. 🙂
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Exactly, Carrie! The momentum gets everything rolling in the right direction. Now that my fitness is a priority, and firmly planted, I have time to prioritize our new family business work. Good for you to have made your fitness a natural part of your life. How long have you been at it and what is your exercise of choice?
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I’ve been working out since middle school when I ran track. I have a large selection of exercise DVDs, so I like to work out at home. A combination of cardio and weights. I love circuit work, but I change things up to avoid injury which is important as we get older.
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That’s right, you’ve shared that you use DVDs and circuit train. And you are right about mixing it up. Right now I’m off to run a few miles and swim. Swimming isn’t taxing yet because I’m just learning how to swim properly, lol.
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Have fun!
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Family, work and physical fitness – in that order. However I realize that all three really need to be in balance.
Starting tomorrow I am recommitting myself to physical fitness. Time to get back into the gym – no more excuses.
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Vic, your life is a perfect example of not making excuses! You have valid reasons for why fitness can take a backseat. When family and work are (relatively) settled, getting back to the gym is awesome. Are you on MyFitnessPal or RunKeeper? If so, we can meet there and cheer each other onto victory 😀
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No, I am low tech – no apps, just lots of sweat!! Lol
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See, you do have your priorities straight! I need to find a more friendly relationship with sweat, lol 😀
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I’ve been a real slacker this summer but I hope to get moving again once the kids are back in school. Yoga is my drug of choice 😉
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Summer is for slacking! Let’s call it rest and renewal 😀 I would love to hear more about your drug of choice, lol. The only time I’ve done yoga (via DVDs) has been when pregnant. Once I’ve had my baby, I (mistakenly in retrospect) threw out the yoga along with the maternity clothes! I’m rethinking this, considering taking a yoga class for the first time. Any recommendations?
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I found that working out regularly is, like writing, in that it is a great and very doable way to feel better about myself. It is a small goal but it is something accomplished. Many times after a particularly hard workout due to not feeling particularly motivated I’ll say to myself “You did it Johnny boy. I’m proud of you.” When I put it in writing it sounds kind of silly but it works for me.
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You really are my brother, John. My bio brother is a triathlete and marathoner who uses athletics to live the straight and narrow after a rough and tumble youth. You make an excellent point about having goals, however small, that actually get done. Getting anything done is quite and encouragement to me! And, you will not be surprised, I self-talk in exactly the same ❤ It feeds a part of me that went hungry for too long. May be silly, but I'm more than OK with that 😀
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Readin’, ‘ritin’ and runnin’ … The three Rs, in my book. Nothing silly about any of those! I do admit to a silly grin after a helluva good run, though. Endorphins are real.
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The 3Rs! Love it!
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Superior thinking, Angie, deep and wise
and excellent delivery
with love
john
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Coming from you, John, I can’t tell you how flattered I am! When I read your poetry, you inspire me to do better, to write with clarity and emotion. I’m working on it, baby steps, so your encouragement means so much. Love right back at you always ❤
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Running is one of my priorities: run to the kitchen to get a towel; run to sop up spilled juice; run to the tub to hose down sticky toddler: etc.
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Sounds like a really cool pentathlon that never ends! I give you a perfect 10 and a gold medal. Be sure to hide it before it gets snatched and hidden next to your phone 😀
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Family has always come first for me, but I’ve maintained my health and fitness a bit for all of my adult life. I just keep moving. Tried everything, settled on walking. It is the easiest to sustain. I sweat daily. Never felt better. So nice to have your posts back, Angie. ☺☺
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“Never felt better” <- THIS 😀 So happy for you and well earned, Van. Just keep moving is excellent advice. (So glad to be back <3)
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Family is my number one, and work still takes precedence over fitness. I can’t sit too still though, gotta move! My main form of fitness is walking with the dog (and sometimes my family) although I’m known to do other exercise-y things, like yoga and tennis. I actually want to get some roller skates! 🙂
It seems priorities are always shifting, and this post pleases my sense of finding balance.
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She like to move it, move it…she got to move it, move it…:D Joey, that you can do a variety of moves while having intense family & work demands is commendable. I’m glad my post rang true and balanced…and now I want roller skates too!
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Meh, my work demands aren’t too much, but thanks for your support.
Seriously, I’m gonna go blow a pile of money at the fair, because it’s only here for a short time, but then Imma get some roller skates when I have money to blow again! I may wear headphones and leg warmers like it’s 1985! 😛
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You know those handmade braided leather bracelets? I picked up a bunch of them at the Phoenix Farmer’s Market because at the moment it seemed like I needed a bunch of them so you may need a bunch of them too and they are definitely at the fair somewhere 😀 Dang it, no you have me thinking about skating again…while my men hit balls with sticks and throw balls and catch balls, I stick to my feet and leave my hand/eye coordination out of it. I loved skating as a kid, rollerbladed in my 30s (until I decided that having a bunch of little kids and potentially having a busted wrist wasn’t a good idea), and now…well skating would be SO much faster than running for this girl. Joey, promise when you get your skates and get all glammed up, you’ll post a picture. Please?!
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Haha! I tried rollerblading, but it’s too hard, like ice skating. But I can roller skate like I’m still a kid, so I’m lookin forward to it.I can’t say I’ll post a photo, maybe just of my feet. I try to keep my body off the internet.
I may, or may not have gone to the ATM today, and I may, or may not, look at leather bracelets 😉
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I won’t tell a soul😇
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That’s so great you found a fitness thing that you love so much! I’ve been wanting to get in shape again but I guess I’m still in the “someone always needing my undivided attention” phase 🙂 I guess my family will have to put up with my flab for a few more years!
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You are so spot on, Jill, your priorities so right. As for the sweet softness of a mama’s body, there is something so comforting about it to our children. My 10yo likes the “pillows” on my arms, commonly knowns as triceps 😀
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ha ha! I remember I used to play with my granny’s arms..I’d flap her triceps and thought it was so fun. Now I can do that to myself 🙂
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Right?! What goes around, comes around💪
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sadly, true! Excuse me while I go do some push ups 🙂
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And chair dips 👊 oh yeah 😝
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I’ve been exercising all of my life. It’s just something you do. Some days I do need to push myself, but when it’s dinner time and I’ve been busy all day, I need to push myself to prepare dinner. I love to exercise and I love to cook, but some days I love’d love to be lazy.
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That’s it! That’s right! I love to cook in the broad sense but there are days when…meh. But cook I do. Similar thing with formal exercise now. It’s becoming a way of life with all the ebb and flow ~~~~
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I have used running as a method of staying in shape for over 30 years. I initially started in my mid 20’s as a way to help me quit smoking. Then it became my stress relief as we started a family and careers became more stressful. I truly don’t know what I would have done without it over the years. I still run, but now just three times a week vs five and on a treadmill because of knees…so you have to make some adjustments, but I really feel like a slug if I go a week without it.
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It just wows me to hear from those who have run all of their adult lives. Good for you, Kirt! Do you participate in any Arizona running events?
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I have intentionally stayed away from marathons and other running events…..I am uber competitive and decided years ago that for me it would take away the joy of running. So I just do my own thing and have kept the love of running alive for me…..
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That’s fantastic, Kirt! You’ve given me something to ponder. I’m rather competitive myself and will need to keep an eye on this. For now, I’m competitive with myself because, let’s face it, everyone kicks my tail…but that’s to be expected…for now 😉
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Best of luck to you!!!!
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Angie – I relate to what Kirt above has to say. Running and specific exercise have seen me through many a rocky patch. I’ve had to modify my way of doing things as I’ve aged but as Tom’s doctor said on Friday, the human body is meant to be on the move. I snapped the ped-o-meter on Thu just for the heck of it and in the process of my daily routine of taking care of Tom and other odds and ends that crop up in my daily life, at the end of the day I had almost 3,000 steps. Of course they are done at different paces. I need the great out-of-doors.
Great posts you are putting up. You are giving us real food for thought. It’s not that you didn’t before but I do love the new content and I feel as though I take something away from each read to incorporate into my life.
Thank you.
Sheri
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Your relationship with Tom clearly needs to be the highest priority for your family. I’m amazed at your efforts, devotion, and love. Not only for Tom, but for others who find themselves in a similar situation. Your blog posts are so solid, rich, and serve the needs of others. So when you tell me that I’m on the right track with my blog, I’m thrilled! Keep that pedometer on I’m cheering you on as you take care of yourself, while also taking care of Tom ❤️
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My priority is to be happy & help there whenever I can. So far so good. But – it sure ain’t as easy as I thought it would be. I’m a passionate person. And -sometimes I can only take & do so much. Hey – I’m only human. 😉
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Great priorities, RoSy! You’re right, as humans we have limits yet as passionate people we can do a lot of good when we put our mind and hearts to it. Stay happy
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I struggle with trying to evenly balance the three. Many times, I will chose my relationship goals over work and fitness. Thankfully, my work never becomes impacted. But, I do want to spend more time focusing on my fitness goals. I’ve been sporadice with my fitness efforts, but have recently recommitted to a successful fitness journey. Thanks for following my blog!
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It is a struggle, a challenge, a dance to balance our highest priorities! I’m with you, left to my own devices I choose relationships over everything else. When all is said and done, my relationships *are* my ultimate highest priorities, and I wouldn’t change that. Yet, without doing my work well and without taking care of myself, I’m less likely to meet my relationship goals well too. It’s all so intertwined in my mind and heart (much to the dismay of my men who are more linear in thought, ha.) I’m so glad to have connected, FreeByrd (cool name) and I’m happy that we’re hitting the fitness hard at the same time. Are you on RunKeeper or MyFitnessPal? I would be glad to meet up there. Also, your blog is terrific! I wasn’t able to comment thoughtfully yesterday because I was traveling with WiFi blackouts. I’m eager to comment on your post about women’s relationships. Nice.
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I agree with you 100 %. I do feel like my relationship, work and fitness goals are so intertwined!! Personally, I know that I have been distant and moody in my relationships when I am unhappy about work, and not feeling confident in how I look or feel (related to my fitness goals). I didn’t realize this until recently. I would love to meet on MyFitness Pal! This will be a great motivator for me haha. I havent been active on the app for a few months now. But, as I mentioned, this has recently changed. Search for me via email @ freebryd101@gmail.com. I appreciate the positive feedback about my blog! I absolutely love your blog, and will probably be asking for your advice (not too time consuming lol) about how you were able to create your menu bar. Thank you so much again for your thoughtful response!
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Absolutely, we have to prioritize ourselves! I think the proper order is:
1) Personal
2) Relationships
3) Work
If you don’t have yourself together you will not be able to keep your relationships together. And if your relationships are not in order, it can be difficult to build any success in the work environment.
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I choose to walk.
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Walking is perfect!
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